You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
Randomize
