I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Just puked most of my soul out..
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