let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
