I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
Randomize
