he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Randomize
