yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
Randomize
