I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
