This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
Randomize
