FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
