I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Randomize
