The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
