Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize