Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Randomize
