I like to think it a success when the cops are called
I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize
