Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Randomize
