Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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