so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Randomize
