Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
