We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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