he looks like a really good dad on facebook
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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