you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
Randomize
