just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
she pinky promised me she was 18
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
Randomize
