Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
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