We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
lets start a swedish sibling band together
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
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