I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
Randomize
