Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
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