He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
My friend wants your phone number so you can teach her how to take a beer bong. She saw you doing them last night and got jealous.
Just tell her to open her throat. I don't want to talk to anyone who is jealous of someone who woke up this morning with a cat in their shirt as a result of that glorious beer bonging skill.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
