I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize