ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Randomize
