lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
When are your genitals available?
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
Randomize
