Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize
