butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
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