Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
I think my moral compass just broke
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
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