Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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