so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
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