I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
Randomize
