i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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