I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Randomize
