I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
