May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize
