i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
Randomize
