I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
