I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Randomize
