If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
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