Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
Randomize
