guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
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