I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
Randomize
