Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
You need Xanax blowdarts
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
Randomize
