what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
Randomize
