they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
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