My hand turned me down
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Randomize