In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
Randomize
