Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
